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Bad Hand

by Bad Hand

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1.
The midnight calls take their toll. In the witching hour you feel like the meaning’s gone. When all you have and all you know melts into the air and you find it gone. Try to make sense of your loss with some way to atone. But it’s a creeping realization when you’re alone; we’re all doomed to grow. We’re all born into trouble like sparks that fly upward and burn the neighboring town. It’s all just a matter of knowing how well you can speak with blood in your mouth. Well you talk like a martyr on judgment day while you leak like a sieve in a storm. When you implicate what you love (walking backwards out into the void) Try to resonate with the source (walking backwards out into the void) Biding your time - you said it yourself - until you feel whole Biding your time - you said it yourself - until you feel whole All of the anthems we sing are just drowning out the thought Like we’re all waiting for somebody’s ghost to make us feel known It’s a cold cause.
2.
Death Drive 03:05
Calling aloud, “just burn the fucker down” Like some strange prophet, hurl curses at the dark You wonder how it came to certain times To bear the weight of all the indignation Beating out the light I feel it, the catch on every single breath No reason to keep illusions No hope for second wind Can’t stop the shaking in your chest now You fall asleep and dream of certain death From mass consumption or societal collapse No possible future to leave for children you will never have I feel it, the catch on every single breath No reason to keep illusions We watch the time collapsing in our hands.
3.
Out of Phase 03:56
You plunge your head into the water and feel it in the wake Of all you left to be cut open. It’s insufferable now, how this all just comes untied Our settled borders on fire, the corners bending out. You want to feel like a chorus underwater Slipping in and out of phase Calling out some secret meaning How plausible to find me Choked up and astray My ear pressed to the glass An intimation of longing you can’t fill Faces you no longer hold in your hands You want to feel like a chorus underwater Slipping in and out of phase Calling out some secret meaning All in the way you keep it close Holding your own While we’re kept out on the back porch listening Now and then the voices raise You would’ve known how it felt Like you’re losing all the air How it felt just like the world’s indifference
4.
Black Lung 03:37
Desperate miner clawing yourself out into light But there was a moment - a series of motions - when you could almost taste the night With all of our black lungs, singing our hymns up and waiting for God to come outside While there is a rot inside of our houses. It will consume us all in time. Stay desperate and full of lack If I feel out of place will you come? Tired of the artifice, the seeming and suffering Tired of the way you suffer fools You ache for the feeling of being insightful of drawing a line and keeping it clear What do I move to make you need it, calling like a child. All of us waiting for you the make yourself a light Just to get even, all of it broken by desire.
5.
You can’t take your life behind the woods and leave it muffled for days Like a watershed poisoning all you drink The silence seeps into noise Keeping elaborate records of all our failings A chorus of accidents Who did you fear that you be? A whimpering, resonant heart, calling the cops? I know who you are All of us tangled in wires, our faces blurred from the frame. We know who we are but can’t give it a name. How long will it keep coming back? The noise of the crowd like some gathering darkness You want more than a song in your throat Create some new obligation to fill your days with purpose Ritual repetition But I am still through the thrum of voices trying to hear you speak - are you calling out now? All of us tangled in wires, our faces blurred from the frame. We know who we are but can’t give it a name. Will you tell me yourself? You’re always moving in and out of light Take all you can back with you in the night Considerate thief.

credits

released December 10, 2018

Bad Hand is Austin Wilson, Steve Anderson & Eric Ungberg
Recorded on July 14 & August 26, 2018
Recorded by James Philips in Durham, NC at Rock St & Mangum St
Mixed by James Philips & Steve Anderson
Mastered by Adam Boose @ Cauliflower Audio in Cleveland, OH

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about

Bad Hand Durham, North Carolina

Austin Wilson and Steve Anderson met in Durham and loved similar music. They decided to start writing and eventually convinced Eric Ungberg to join in to recording 5 songs before Austin moved to Providence. These songs were never played live.

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